“We should stop thinking we don’t deserve success: the universe does not distribute its gifts and its horrors with divinely accurate knowledge of the good and bad within each of us. Most of what we win is not quite deserved – and most of what we suffer isn’t either.”
– Alain De Botton
“We don’t fall in love with those who care for us in ideal ways, we fall in love with those who care for us in familiar ways.”
– Alain De Botton
“After 40 (old age for most of man’s history), one should strive to be more or less packed and ready to go were the end call to come.”
– Alain de Botton
“We’re surrounded by stories of success that conspire to make success seem easier than it in fact is – and therefore that unwittingly destroy the confidence we can muster in the face of our obstacles. Every great achievement was monstrously hard.”
– Alain De Botton
‘Wasting time’ is mostly just fear.
– Alain de Botton
“We crave not admiration, but to be properly known, and yet, still liked and forgiven.”
– Alain De Botton
“The fear of being an Impostor gets resolved not when we become deeply sure of our abilities but when recognise that we’re not unusual in doubting ourselves. It’s not that we stop being impostors but that we realise that everyone is – and that our normal quota of self-doubt has really very little to do with the actual contribution that anyone makes.”
– Alain De Botton
“Most relationship problems condensed: someone is standing too close, someone is standing too far.”
– Alain de Botton
“No one is as strong as they seem – or as daunting as we fear.”
– Alain De Botton
“We have taken self-criticism too far when it no longer has any effect on our level of achievement, when it simply saps our morale and our will to get out of bed.”
– Alain De Botton
“The ideal lover: someone who corrects the biases of one’s own personality.”
– Alain de Botton
“We shouldn’t congratulate ourselves for resisting temptations we never felt in the first place.”
– Alain de Botton
“Regret is the price we pay for choice.”
– Alain de Botton
“Bitterness: anger that forgot where it came from.”
– Alain de Botton
“The internet to this generation of writers as alcohol was to previous ones: anxiety suppressant, enemy of talent, challenge.”
– Alain de Botton